Ludum Dare 32 — April 17th-20th, 2015 — Theme: An Unconventional Weapon

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UnCUMventional Weapon

by Caio Varalta - Jam Entry

UnCUMventional Weapon is an adventure game with emphasis on humor. There's strong language and sexual themes.
In this game, you'll control a character with the name you give him, and by reading a card of your girlfriend "I have another love", you start your adventure.
Nobody likes to be cheated. This protagonist, much less!!
It's time to take her own dildo, and kill everyone that stands in your path!
*-----------------GAME CONTROLS--------------------*
Use the arrow keys to move.
Use X to access the game menu.

Downloads and Links




gene-z says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 2:10pm

no man

Apr 21, 2015 @ 11:30pm

Wow, really? No.

nassi says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 12:23am

Lessons learned:
- fuck right in the pussy
- don't steal
- gambling is profitable
- people don't really mind if you call them horrible names

Quite crude in a lot of ways :P.

Apr 22, 2015 @ 12:27am

Sometimes, games with adult themes are surprisingly interesting. There was one such game during LD29: an adventure game about an aging porn star who relived his glory days and ultimately kidnapped a small child and brought her to Mexico. This game starts off with a massive penis on the title screen, and only gets worse from there.

I can only hope that the misogynistic "I'm gonna kill that whoring bitch" mentality that the protagonist here exudes does not represent Mister Varalta's real-life attitudes towards relationships.

PS: You know that dildos don't ejaculate, right?

PPS: You know there are ten-year-old girls participating in this jam, right?

psychomonster says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 9:11am

Sorry... this is kinda tasteless stuff... story sounds like written by a psychopath or maybe I missunderstood some sort of humor... hope so...

Caio Varalta says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 8:08pm

Thanks for the feedback, guys!
This game was all about testing and having fun with the development.
However, it's incredible how some of you guys takes thing so serious... Keep it in mind, @Thingo Studios: FUN. FUN. If you don't had fun, ok. But many of my friends had, other game developers et cetera.
Of course that in every relationship of mine I say "I'll kill you, bitch", and kill the person. Makes all the world sense.
What's the matter if dildos don't ejaculate, also? It's a GAME. Dragons doesn't exist, but there are many games where you kill dragons. You criticize them for that?

In anyway, thanks for the feedback everyone! If you guys didn't liked the game, put the 1 stars, comment and I'll appreciate.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Geckoo1337 says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 9:51pm

I didn't retrieve an eventual previous project from you on Ludum Dare? Maybe it's the first. You said - it's incredible how some of you guys takes thing so serious. It's right. Here we have submitted some games which have been developed with the desire to share something interesting. Don't be angry if you don't understand our point of view, but LD isn't a showcase so as to refouler the sludge that some have in their head. Of course, we appreciate humor - but I do a difference between humor and sauciness/vulgarity. Maybe next time it will be better. Please you would not blame me for that. With kindliness, I have just shared with you my point of you. See you later friend ++

Caio Varalta says ...
Apr 23, 2015 @ 12:47am

It's an interesting point of view. I appreciate comments like yours. Your telling the true and helping me.
Was all about test. Crazy ideas, first jam, you know.
Anyway, thanks. I'm quite sorry if somethings went wrong.

Apr 23, 2015 @ 1:19am

For reference, going around and beating people up with a stolen dildo isn't necessarily awful.

It's the whole crux of this game being the player character's quest to murder his girlfriend that I find pretty much totally unsalvageable.

Hambone says ...
Apr 24, 2015 @ 9:42pm


DeadFragment says ...
Apr 24, 2015 @ 10:02pm

The drawings for the opening are really well done and the art style in game is a really cute style, however the theme of the game isn't handled too well, I'm totally up for a game in which I have to use a dildo in a strange way (whey) and you could have made it very funny, but it just seemed a bit strong.


Caio Varalta says ...
Apr 25, 2015 @ 1:59pm

Thanks for the comments!
@Thingo Studios: Beat the game, and you'll see it ending message. He don't murder his girlfriend...

Crowbeak says ...
Apr 26, 2015 @ 4:38am

I find the subject matter of this entry offensive. Not because it involves nudity/sex/etc. but because it falls squarely into the category of glorifying dangerous attitudes that are already far too pervasive. I see in the comments that you're trying to shrug the subject matter off as intended to be not serious, but not taking it seriously is exactly the problem. This IS tasteless. It's simply not cool.

jmborden says ...
May 8, 2015 @ 4:50pm

Nobody has their triggers set off where the point of the game is to kill as many humans as possible with a clearly psychopathic protagonist. But make one game where the point is to hunt down your ex to kill her with a dildo and everyone loses their minds.

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