Ludum Dare 32 — April 17th-20th, 2015 — Theme: An Unconventional Weapon

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Wounded by Words

by Traumendes_Madchen - Jam Entry

Wounded by Words is the tale of six people who are trapped in the ruins of a shopping center after a terrorist attack. All they can do is wait for the rescue team to come. As the individuals are growing more and more desperate over time, you'll be able to grow closer to them and discover their stories.

Downloads and Links


Ratings

Coolness92%
#64Graphics(Jam)4.38
#77Mood(Jam)3.88
#90Audio(Jam)3.79
#131Overall(Jam)3.75
#540Fun(Jam)3.02
#654Theme(Jam)3.16
#722Humor(Jam)2.44
#784Innovation(Jam)2.62

Comments

TheCrouchMode says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 2:08pm

Impressive for a weekend's work. Only complaints are some minor language and spelling notes, but that's no big deal.

Erkberg says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 3:28pm

Wow, that was really impressive. I pretty much loved everything about this game. The graphics are absolutely stunning, the music is just great and the writing (expect for some little typos) is excellent. The story and the characters were really interesting and kept me playing all the way to the end. Amazing job!

Apr 21, 2015 @ 7:39pm

Ah, I didn't expected to have votes already >__<. I actually completely forgotten to include the endings, so I just uploaded a new build (stupid code error, ahem).

@TheCrouchMode & @Erkberg
Thanks a lot! Since I wrote in haste, there are many typos. I'll try to fix them as soon as possible! (and with the help of a good night of sleep XD)

Dagatts says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 9:10pm

Very nice game, very well done. Congratulations! =D

trappytrap92 says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 9:36pm

Great story and graphics, the final result are amazing for a 72 hours work! Love the story

RoryD says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 9:48pm

Wow, was all the art and audio done since Friday? That's impressive if so. It's not the kind of game I would normally play. I wish there were a bit more interactivity. Most of the time is spent clicking to get to the next part of the story.

pikmin4000 says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 9:57pm

Wow longest ludum dare game ever! Over half an hour, I was hooked, I read everything. I got normal ending, which is pretty anti-climactic but I still enjoyed the characters. Good work!

[SPOILER]
Btw, who took Haasan's juice bottle?
[/SPOILER]

Ryusui says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 10:04pm

I'm having trouble downloading the game. Chrome gets through about 15-20MB and then quits. Maybe try uploading to Dropbox?

squirrelbot says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 10:12pm

Somehow, you managed to write an incredibly deep story in one weekend. I'll probably try for the other endings sometime, I just got a normal end.

Apr 21, 2015 @ 10:45pm

Really nice work. 5/5 for a jam. Amazing story and characters.

Ryusui says ...
Apr 21, 2015 @ 11:05pm

Finally got it to download and run. The story had me engrossed enough that I didn't mind the typos and spotty English throughout (though if anyone needs a proofreader/editor for a future Ludum Dare, just let me know!)

Apr 22, 2015 @ 2:06pm

@Dagatts, @traooytrap92 & @12 Pechas Of Souls
Thank you very much, I'm glad you enjoyed it :3

@RoryD
Between Saturday morning and Monday evening actually but all the artists were so fast at drawing, I ended up being the only one struggling with time strangely enough ='D.

Well, it’s a visual novel at heart, so there's indeed not that much gameplay. I wanted to add a bit more interactivity but didn’t have the time. Maybe I'll do that in an updated version ^^.

@pikmin4000
Ahah, I really had to rush during the whole weekend to finish the writing. I think I never went so fast in my life. Thank you ^^.

About the endings: I didn't have time to include Hassan's but the other three are here. You have to get really closer to someone to his/her ending though.

[SPOILER]
If you talk to the character in question just after the quarrel he/she will admit the theft. So you can save before the choice and reload to see who it is. I wanted to deepen this work a little more and couldn't due to the time limit. I may try to add some sort of investigation part in an updated version =).
[/SPOILER]

@Ryusui
I just added the game on itchio, I hope it'll prevent any download problem from now on.

Ahah, as you can guess, English is not my native language and writing that much in a tight period of time proved to be a real challenge! We'll try to fix all those typos in an updated version. If you have spotted some, you can still share them to help us =).

@squirrelbot
It’s an idea I had in mind since a few weeks or months and I didn’t have the opportunity to make something out of it. Ludum Dare was perfect for that. I’m still unsatisfied since I couldn't really polish my writing as much as I wanted X). Thanks !

About the endings: I didn't have time to include Hassan's but the other three are here. You have to get really closer to someone to his/her ending though.

DarkwindMedia says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 4:14pm

Amazing story and graphics!

terpin says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 4:23pm

You really went the extra mile in this game! It's so great to see something like this up, for real (we can only have so many potato shooters amirite?) What engine did you use to build this?

OddballDave says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 4:30pm

That certainly was a lot of words. Very impressive amount of work for 72 hours. Good stuff.

jhrrsn says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 4:36pm

A very impressive, complete piece of work for a weekend! Good job!

louis.denizet says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 4:46pm

Damn this is pretty incredible for a game jam, nice narrative and great execution!

Apr 22, 2015 @ 5:29pm

Top notch game! Your team did a good job making a fully polished VN in just 72 hours! Good graphics, music, and plenty of quality writing! If I have to give critisism, I'd say that the introduction scene was a little forced, and I don't think you needed to spell everything out (like with Hassan, I thought it was clear enough what was going on there). Excellent showing though!

Apr 22, 2015 @ 5:44pm

And some typo reports, if you're taking them!
"we're lucky none of us got any major injury" -> injuries
"what if the platform fall on us" -> falls
"My son Hassan, right here, slept away" -> slipped
"they went to an exposition" -> exhibition (probably?)
Maybe not a typo but I'm not sure what Eleesha meant by "not channelling my child" (maybe it was meant to be challenging)?

Good work for the time period, sleep levels, and not being native speakers though! I might play a bit more to see what endings I can get later, so there may be more typo reports coming, if you want!

NoWandStudios says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 5:48pm

Nice pics and music. Maybe dialogues are a bit tedious but all on all it's a nice work for a jam. Congrats!

Bashabookoos says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 6:03pm

Its obvious a huge amount of work went into this game, the art and sound are fantastic. I can see there is a deep intricate story as well. I started to read the story, but then I just started to click as fast as I could to skip the whole thing. I think it's a mistake to put so much exposition at the beginning of a game, before the player is invested in the mechanics. I usually skip text unless I've already been pulled in by the game. Would this not have been better as a manga or anime? I got all the way to the end just clicking as fast as I could(Granted, it was the bad ending). My suggestion is if you're going to make a game, tell the story with the game mechanics.

Apr 22, 2015 @ 7:41pm

@DarkwindMedia, @jhrrsn, @louis.denizet & @NoWandStudios
Thanks a lot, I’m glad to see our efforts payed!

@terpin
We use RenPy ^^. It’s really the best engine if you’re into visual novel: free, easy to use (Python FTW) and advanced enough to do more stuff if you have skills. Plus the community is super friendly and involved!

Potato shooters ar great, but the more diverse games can be, the better. That’s why I hope narrative ones like this one have their place here ;)

@OddballDave
Yep, I never wrote so much so fast in my life XD.
According to RenPy Launcher, the game contains 1,215 dialogue blocks, containing 19,674 words and 102,511characters, for an average of 16.2 words and 84 characters per block.

@RockhopperGames
It’s okay, I’m open to feedbacks and I’m hoping to upload an improved version in the following days/weeks ^^. What in the introduction scene seemed forced to you exactly? I have to admit I expected that most people wouldn’t be familiar with some topics so maybe I went a bit too far on the obvious side?

I’m taking the typo reports as well, thanks XD ! If you have more, maybe a mail would be more appropriate. Here’s our contact form: http://traumendes-madchen.com/contact/

« Maybe not a typo but I'm not sure what Eleesha meant by "not channelling my child" (maybe it was meant to be challenging)? » = Ah, I meant that she have to « restrain him » in someway. I guess I didn’t use the right word.

@Bashabookoos
Well, it’s a visual novel at core, so text is the essence of the game. I do tend to write slow introductions though, so I may be guilty. I’m open to advices to rewrite the beginning but I’m afraid I can’t add many game mechanics X).

Cstudios says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 8:31pm

Wow, excellent writing, however the intro should be shorter, i mean its required for the story... I did like it in the end. Its an interactive novel.

ChronusZ says ...
Apr 22, 2015 @ 10:47pm

Great story! My only complaints would be that the ends (or at least the normal end that I got) somewhat spoiled the message by shoving it in my face, and the theme seemed tacked on. Regardless, that was a great experience!

Lady Beardo says ...
Apr 23, 2015 @ 2:39pm

A lot of work in this one! Well done.

x1212 says ...
Apr 23, 2015 @ 6:31pm

I love that there's a save button! I really like this game, but don't have time to finish it in one go right now.
Also great graphics, even with a team of artists, to get that much done in time must have been hard.

Apr 23, 2015 @ 8:30pm

@Cstudios
Yeah, I was told it was a bit too long. Do you think I should make an intro « in media res » instead?
Glad to see people liking interactive/visual novel, it’s heartwarming :3

@ChronusZ
Ah, you think the ending is too forced? Since the theme isn’t clearly explicit, I thought it would be a good moment for that. Especially since people told me the theme wasn’t clear last time I entered Ludum Dare. What would you recommend to correct that?

@Lady Beardo
Thank you very much!

@x1212
Well, it’s a pretty standard feature for a visual novel: since reading text takes some time, it wouldn’t be comfortable at all not to be able to stop whenever you want =).
Actually the artists were strangely efficient and it’s me who was behind with the writing during the whole event X’).

BlitzProg says ...
Apr 24, 2015 @ 1:06am

This was impressive! A lot of work went into this and it was a very interesting story.

Technical-wise - Because I'm not used of seeing the protagonist I took some time to properly identify the actual narrator as Agathe. But I quickly got over it and seeing her and her facial expression was in fact quite good. As for the app in itself, there's nothing much to say. Stable and glitchless for two play-through, not that I was expecting otherwise from a RenPy app :)
A few typos I forgot to note down since I was quite enjoying the story. I liked the little interactive moments with the scenery.

The weak point would definitively be the theme I'd say. The title while attractive didn't in fact look so leading and its meaning came to me quite abruptly, and in the end it felts like the story was somewhat adapted to it rather than built around it.

On a little note, the bad ending was also very anticlimactic... In fact does it has any purpose? Clicking the relevant choice was like jumping in a pool of lava expecting something else than burning instantly to death. Unless I'm missing something, it felt like a Stanley Parable trap, where you say to yourself "I can't possibly see any other outcome than what's going to happen by doing this" and it is EXACTLY what happens. xD

Overall very good. Pleasant and entertaining with little grimdark, I liked it :)

nassi says ...
Apr 24, 2015 @ 1:22am

Spent more time on this than on many of the other entries combined. After getting the normal ending I also checked all the other endings and paths too. Sure there were some typos but actually surprisingly few considering the staggering amount of content. Of course proofreading all of it wouldn't hurt, but it's definitely more than good enough for a jam game.

I like how Dave created some conflict in the group, but still wasn't an over the top "bad guy", just somewhat insensitive. Would've liked a Dave ending too, or at least more interaction with him. All the other characters felt very real and believable too with their own lives and problems. I also liked how much variation there was in the facial expressions and having the characters blink was a really nice touch. As were the semi-animated backgrounds and varied music.

Good amount of (varied) interaction too. The choices were also good in that when selecting one I could be almost certain of the effect it would have. In my opinion it's quite annoying how in some visual novels you think a choice will have a certain effect, but actually it leads to something completely unintended (well, not that life sometimes isn't like that :P).

It's true that explicitly spelling out things can be a double edged sword, but I didn't think it was overdone here and in my opinion fit with the image that I had of the protagonist.

Not much actual criticism, but rather praise; really solid entry all around. Saw your post during the weekend about almost not participating, but I'm glad you saw it through after all.

jhrrsn says ...
Apr 25, 2015 @ 6:46pm

Hey :) We fixed the bug in our game that stopped you progressing - if you feel like giving it a second look then please do! Thanks for feeding back :)

DeadFragment says ...
Apr 26, 2015 @ 5:04pm

Awesome game and some very awesome graphics! very impressive considering the time limit. Well done!

-Neith

caryoscelus says ...
Apr 29, 2015 @ 8:24am

What can i say? The worst things here were a bit of badly readable text in nvl mode and somewhat annoying fading effect in interactions.

So, really great work! Will definitely check out other endings (i got normal and bad so far).

I wonder how Agathe got the gun, if they took it from her?

May 2, 2015 @ 3:44pm

The part of the introduction that seemed a bit forced to me was how everyone stated their names and their jobs. It's a small thing, but the introduction is the first time you really get to compare all the characters to each other, so it's a chance to demonstrate how individual each character is. Focusing on how the characters talk and act is more important than letting you know what they do (except maybe for Dave, since his job seems to be a big part of his life), in my opinion.

And I guess maybe I am a bit more familiar with some of those conditions than people generally might be, so disregard that bit! >_< (A compromise could be giving the player an option to have Agathe stand up for Hassan as if she knew what up with him, and an option to ask about it instead, but it's not really the type of VN that gives those kind of choices)

And it would be "challenging" in that case, then! "Channeling" would have worked if she meant 'direct him' or something like that, but it'd be a bit of an unusual choice.

Arche-san says ...
May 2, 2015 @ 6:13pm

Wow! That's a long story for the amount of time.
The story gives me gooses bumps 'til the end.
Good job :)

May 4, 2015 @ 1:42pm

@BlitzProg
BlitzProg, what are you doing here 0o? Most people commenting on the Ludum Dare page are other participants, you could have let a comment on the team blog instead, you know! (Plus you could have commented here directly in French…)

« As for the app in itself, there's nothing much to say. Stable and glitchless for two play-through, not that I was expecting otherwise from a RenPy app » = As you said, it’s a RenPy visual novel, it would require a lot of efforts on my part to make the game unstable X’).

I think you’re reading a bit too much into the bad ending because there was no surprise intended. I got you used to more surprising twists, maybe ^^’ ?

Thanks for posting your opinion. Next time, please use the devblog: it looks like you’re avoiding it at all cost =’).

@nassi
It’s true the story must be quite long for a game jam entry X’). Out of curiosity, how much time did it take you to finish?

I really wanted to show that poor Dae was ignorant but not a bad guy overall, so there’s no real antagonist per se (except the wall maybe, since it prevents them from escaping XD). I added a route for him in an updated version if you want =).

I wanted to add more choices and variations at first but since I didn’t even find the time to write all routes/endings, it was quickly set aside. I’m relieved it doesn’t seem too « simplistic ».

Ah, you saw that too ><. I really wasn’t inspired by the theme, so it’s a miracle I mustered the strength to go with it… Anyway, thanks for the detailed feedback!

@jhrrsn
I’ll take a look when I’ll have the time, thanks for telling me ;)

@DeadFragment & @Arche-san
Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!

@caryoscelys
I removed the fading effects in the latest update, I’ll still have to find a solution for the nvl mode though. If you want to go for all endings, I’d avise you to download the update, since it includes Dave & Hassans endings as welll ^^.

Err, that’s a good question! I may write an epilogue at some point to touch upon the matter.

@RockhopperGames
Thanks for the typos report, I replied to your mail ^^.

Hum, it’s true that stating the most basic facts isn’t that interesting. Aren’t introductions in real life always a bit typical though?

« And I guess maybe I am a bit more familiar with some of those conditions than people generally might be, so disregard that bit! >_< […] » = Hey, but it’s great! I started on the principle that most people wouldn’t really know these topics, so I tried to make them understand the subject a bit better. I thought I should to wait a bit before stating his condition to push the reader to think about it. Hassan’s route is supposed to give the player the opportunity to get closer to him, but it isn’t that easy to set up since he won’t let people approach him so easily either X’).

Ah, and I changed the word in the new version since « channeling » really wasn’t the best option XD.

Xanjos says ...
May 4, 2015 @ 3:51pm

For a visual novel, the story is pretty deep and interesting plus I loved the characterisation.

Sytech says ...
May 4, 2015 @ 7:31pm

Good entry and great graphics. Impressive length for a weekend's work! I couldn't really apply the theme to this one though.

CScribes says ...
May 4, 2015 @ 8:38pm

Great entry :) I love the GUI and music the most. Haven't gotten through all routes yet, but I can already say it's very good. Some grammatical errors/unnatural sentences but, that's to be understood haha

gv1351 says ...
May 5, 2015 @ 4:32am

Nice graphics but I didn't think this is a game it is a interactive comic book

caryoscelus says ...
May 8, 2015 @ 5:57pm

Traumendes_Madchen, you can try using outlines ( http://www.renpy.org/doc/html/style_properties.html#style-property-outlines ) for nvl.

Finished all the branches now. Not sure which one i liked better, but Dave branch felt a bit overly optimistic to me :) It's good thing you didn't make him juice robber after all though.

Another minor technical note: repeating ending part can't be skipped for some reason. Perhaps you just copied the text instead of reusing it?

May 9, 2015 @ 7:46pm

@Xanjos & @CScribes
Thank you both, it means a lot to me :3

@Sytech
Well, I tried to go the « Words as Weapon » approach but it’s true it was difficult to convey it accurately X). Some people told me I was too obvious about it in the ending though.

@gv1351
It’s called a visual novel actually. Narrative games are different but for me they’re still games ;).

@caryoscelys
I don’t remember using outlines before but it might be a good idea, I’ll look into that ^^.

Ahah, it would be too easy to make Dave the culprit since he’s kind of the « outcast » of the group. At least, I’d like to avoid the « black and white » outcome ^^. What felt optimistic to you? The fact he’s trying to be less tactless?

Ah! The reason is simple: each ending is a different label, and only the middle part is copied, so you can’t really skip it. Do you think I should make it skippable? (I admit I didn’t think about it >_<)

May 9, 2015 @ 9:44pm

I am astounded. This entry has so much emotion, and the audio was phenomenal. The characters were totally real and believable. Great Job! You are fantastic, thank you for creating such a compelling VN in such a short time.

NAL says ...
May 10, 2015 @ 10:49am

I'm never normally a fan of story-driven games like this, but this one was so well written I played/read it to the end. Very, very nice.

jukimv1986 says ...
May 11, 2015 @ 6:33pm

Very nice and appealing visual novel, it reminds me a bit of Reversion 2.

May 11, 2015 @ 8:24pm

@impossibleleaf
Thank you very much, I'm flattered >__<. I may try to make an extended version one day if I have the time, I think the story would definitely need me to go deeper into the writing!

@NAL
Thank you, I'm glad I got someone not usually interested in story-driven games to read my story :3. I'll do my best to show how awesome visual novel can be ;).

@jukimv1986
Ive never heard of Reversion 2 before, I'm genuinely intrigued! Thanks for the tip, I'll look into that ^^.

caryoscelus says ...
May 12, 2015 @ 9:12am

Traumendes_Madchen, probably not the fact that he's trying itself, but that he seemingly starts understanding his daughter and accepting he might have been wrong for so long. People tend to defend their lifestyle and feeling of being righteous more stubbornly, i think.

Skipping feature really helps when reading different branches and when it suddenly stops working you get the impression that you haven't read this text, which then gives alternatives to read the same text over and over or be afraid of missing something new. While it's not a big issue, i think it's better to avoid this. (just in case you don't know about it, simplest way is to use call/return instead of copying; http://www.renpy.org/doc/html/label.html#call-statement )

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